1. Ignore road signs. If the sign says "Road close: We apologise for inconvenience your trip", and there's a big hole in in it - don't worry, you can still squeeze a bike through the busiest of construction sites. There's no health and safety here.
2. Junctions: ride slowly, and everyone will avoid you just fine. Close your eyes, if that helps.
3. Watch for dogs/potholes/Hindu offerings. A burning joss stick can cause punctures.
4. It can be hot at junctions while you're waiting for the lights to change. Stop in the shade - even if it's the wrong lane.
5. Taxi drivers will still try to offer you a ride, even if you're on a bike. Ignore them.
6. Smoking while riding is a good way of fitting in with the local culture. Make sure you fit an ashtray to keep the streets clean.
7. Improve the stability of your bicycle by attaching a crate of chickens to either side.
8. There's an optimum speed to go for - too fast, and it's hard work, too slow, and you lose the cooling breeze. According to local custom, the optimal speed is 2.6 mph.
9. Brakes aren't strictly necessary (see 2 and 8) - it will improve your road sense if you don't use them.
10. If the street is blocked with motorbikes, use the pavement. If that's full of motorbikes too, stop for an ice tea. The roads will be less busy tomorrow.
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